Translate by Chat GPT
Translation Activity Worksheet - Using Gen AI for Translating Poem
Original Poem
مجھ سے پہلی سی محبت مری محبوب نہ مانگ
میں نے سمجھا تھا کہ تو ہے تو درخشاں ہے حیات
تیرا غم ہے تو غم دہر کا جھگڑا کیا ہے
تیری صورت سے ہے عالم میں بہاروں کو ثبات
تیری آنکھوں کے سوا دنیا میں رکھا کیا ہے
تو جو مل جائے تو تقدیر نگوں ہو جائے
یوں نہ تھا میں نے فقط چاہا تھا یوں ہو جائے
اور بھی دکھ ہیں زمانے میں محبت کے سوا
راحتیں اور بھی ہیں وصل کی راحت کے سوا
ان گنت صدیوں کے تاریک بہیمانہ طلسم
ریشم و اطلس و کمخاب میں بنوائے ہوئے
جا بہ جا بکتے ہوئے کوچہ و بازار میں جسم
خاک میں لتھڑے ہوئے خون میں نہلائے ہوئے
جسم نکلے ہوئے امراض کے تنوروں سے
پیپ بہتی ہوئی گلتے ہوئے ناسوروں سے
لوٹ جاتی ہے ادھر کو بھی نظر کیا کیجے
اب بھی دل کش ہے ترا حسن مگر کیا کیجے
اور بھی دکھ ہیں زمانے میں محبت کے سوا
راحتیں اور بھی ہیں وصل کی راحت کے سوا
Translate by Chat GPT
मुझसे पहली-सी मोहब्बत, मेरी महबूब, न माँग
(फ़ैज़ अहमद फ़ैज़ — काव्यात्मक हिंदी अनुवाद)
मुझसे पहली-सी मोहब्बत, मेरी महबूब, न माँग।
मैंने माना था कि तू है तो उजाला है जीवन,
तेरा ग़म है तो ग़म-ए-दुनिया का झंझट क्या है?
तेरे चेहरे से ही इस जग की बहारें क़ायम,
तेरी आँखों के सिवा इस जहाँ में रखा क्या है?
तू अगर मिल जाए तो क़िस्मत झुकी जाए,
यूँ न था—मैंने तो बस चाहा था यूँ हो जाए।
और भी दुख हैं ज़माने में मोहब्बत के सिवा,
और भी सुख हैं यहाँ वस्ल की राहत के सिवा।
अनगिनत सदियों के अंधे, वहशी तिलिस्म,
रेशम-ओ-अतलस में लिपटे हुए, रचे गए।
गली-कूचों, बाज़ारों में बिकते हुए जिस्म,
ख़ाक में लिथड़े हुए, ख़ून में डूबे गए।
जिस्म जो निकले हैं बीमारियों की भट्ठी से,
पीप बहती हुई, गलते हुए नासूरों से।
नज़र लौटती है उधर भी—तो क्या कीजे?
अब भी आकर्षक है तेरा हुस्न, पर क्या कीजे?
और भी दुख हैं ज़माने में मोहब्बत के सिवा,
और भी सुख हैं यहाँ वस्ल की राहत के सिवा।
Translation by Gemini
Do Not Ask Me, My Love, for That First Love
Do not ask me, my love, for that love we had before. I once believed that life shone bright because of you alone; That if I had your grief, why should I care for the world's groan? That through your face, the seasons found their permanence and grace; That nothing lived within this world, save the beauty of your face.
If I could only win you, fate would bow its head to me. Yet it was not so; I merely wished that it could be.
There are sorrows in this world, far beyond the grief of love, And comforts other than the touch that lovers dream of.
The dark and brutal sorcery of countless centuries, Woven into silk and gold and finest tapestries; Bodies sold in every lane, in markets high and low, Smeared in dust and bathed in blood, with nowhere else to go.
Bodies emerging from the ovens of a deep disease, With festering sores and flowing pus, and no hope for release. My gaze returns to this as well; what then can I do? Your beauty is still ravishing, but what then can I do?
There are sorrows in this world, far beyond the grief of love, And comforts other than the touch that lovers dream of.
1. Syntax, Sound, and Metre
Gemini (English): To maintain the sound and metre, Gemini employed a loose Iambic Hexameter. The choice of AABB or ABCB rhyme schemes in certain stanzas (e.g., alone/groan, grace/face) attempts to replicate the Radif and Qaafiya (refrain and rhyme) of the Urdu Ghazal style. However, English syntax often struggles with the "nested" clauses of Urdu poetry, leading to longer sentences than the original.
ChatGPT (Hindi): Since Hindi and Urdu share the same grammatical base (Khariboli), the syntax remains almost identical to the original. It retains the rhythmic "beat" of the poem perfectly because it doesn't have to navigate the structural gap between Indo-European and Germanic language families. It focuses on transcreation—keeping the Persianized vocabulary (Gham-e-Duniya) which carries the phonetic weight of the original.
2. Lexicon, Grammar, and Semiotics
Lexicon: A major challenge is the word "Vasal" (Union). Gemini translates this as "the touch that lovers dream of," which is a semiotic expansion. The original word is a singular, heavy concept in Sufi and Urdu poetry. ChatGPT retains "Vasl," assuming the reader’s cultural literacy.
Semiotics of Horror: In the second half, Faiz uses "Tanoor" (Ovens/Furnaces) and "Nasoor" (Festering sores).
Gemini uses "ovens of a deep disease," which captures the heat and intensity but loses the specific cultural image of a communal bread oven used as a metaphor for a burning, diseased society.
ChatGPT uses "Bhatti" (Kiln/Furnace), which is a closer cultural equivalent to Tanoor.
3. Cultural Connotations and Collocations
Collocations: The phrase "Darakhshan hai Hayat" (Life is radiant) is a classic poetic collocation.
Gemini renders this as "life shone bright," which is an English cliché, losing the slightly formal, grander tone of Darakhshan.
ChatGPT uses "Ujala" (Light), which simplifies the Persianized Urdu but keeps the emotional resonance.
Silk and Brocade: The triplet "Resham-o-Atlas-o-Kamkhab" represents tiers of feudal luxury. Gemini summarizes these as "silk and gold and finest tapestries." While "tapestries" captures the visual, it misses the specific socio-economic hierarchy of the fabrics mentioned by Faiz.
4. Challenges and Resolutions
The "Untranslatable" Refrain: The line "Aur bhi dukh hain zamane mein mohabbat ke siva" is a philosophical pivot.
Challenge: How to translate "Dukh" (Sorrow/Pain/Hardship) without making it sound purely emotional?
Resolution: Gemini used "sorrows... beyond the grief of love," contrasting Grief with Sorrow to create a hierarchy of pain. ChatGPT relied on the shared Urdu-Hindi "Dukh," which carries both physical and existential weight.
The Pivot: The word "Magar" (But) in "Ab bhi dilkash hai tera husn magar kya kijiye" is the heart of the poem. Gemini resolves this with "but what then can I do?", which captures the helplessness (the Majboori) of the poet caught between love and revolution.
Comparison Summary: Which Tool Performed Better?
ChatGPT performed better at retaining the soul and literal structure of the poem because it stayed within the same linguistic family. It is an "intralingual" translation that preserves the original's gravity.
Gemini performed better at cross-cultural communication. It took the "spirit" of Faiz—his Marxist leanings hidden behind romantic imagery—and made it accessible to an English ear through rhyme and evocative imagery, even where it sacrificed literal precision.
Reflection: Alignment with Theoretical Frameworks
Roman Jakobson (Equivalence in Difference): Jakobson argued that "poetry by definition is untranslatable." We see this in the shift from Urdu to English; Gemini had to use creative transposition—moving from the specific "Tanoor" to the general "Oven"—to achieve "equivalence" in the reader's emotional response.
J.C. Catford (Formal Correspondence): ChatGPT achieves high formal correspondence because the grammar of Hindi and Urdu is nearly identical. Gemini, however, experiences "translation shifts" (Catford’s term), where a noun in Urdu becomes a descriptive phrase in English to preserve the meaning.
G.N. Devy & A.K. Ramanujan: Devy speaks of the "afterlife" of a poem. This translation gives Faiz an afterlife in a global context. Ramanujan’s ideas on "Interior and Exterior" (Akam and Puram) landscapes are vital here; the poem begins in the Akam (interior/love) and is forced into the Puram (exterior/public struggle). Both AI tools successfully navigated this transition, which is the most critical thematic element of the poem.
Conclusion: The AI translations demonstrate that while syntax can be mapped, the "cultural memory" of words like Kamkhab or Vasal often requires a trade-off between technical accuracy and poetic flow.
Original Poem : The Second Coming
By William Butler Yeats
Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.
Surely some revelation is at hand;
Surely the Second Coming is at hand.
The Second Coming! Hardly are those words out
When a vast image out of Spiritus Mundi
Troubles my sight: somewhere in sands of the desert
A shape with lion body and the head of a man,
A gaze blank and pitiless as the sun,
Is moving its slow thighs, while all about it
Reel shadows of the indignant desert birds.
The darkness drops again; but now I know
That twenty centuries of stony sleep
Were vexed to nightmare by a rocking cradle,
And what rough beast, its hour come round at last,
Slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?
Translate by Chat GPT
द सेकण्ड कमिंग
— डब्ल्यू. बी. यीट्स
घूमते-घूमते फैलती हुई वर्तुल में
बाज़ अब बाज़पाल की पुकार नहीं सुनता;
सब कुछ बिखर रहा है—केन्द्र टिक नहीं पाता,
नग्न अराजकता जगत पर छोड़ दी गई है।
रक्त से धुँधली लहर छूट पड़ी है, हर ओर
निर्दोषता के संस्कार डूबते जा रहे हैं;
श्रेष्ठ जन संकल्पहीन हैं,
और निकृष्ट जन उन्मत्त उग्रता से भरे हुए।
निश्चय ही कोई उद्घाटन समीप है,
निश्चय ही दूसरा आगमन समीप है।
दूसरा आगमन!
ये शब्द अभी गूँजे ही थे कि
Spiritus Mundi से उपजी
एक विराट प्रतिमा मेरी दृष्टि को विचलित कर देती है—
कहीं मरुस्थल की रेत में
सिंह का शरीर, मनुष्य का मस्तक,
जिसकी दृष्टि सूर्य-सी निष्ठुर और शून्य है,
अपने भारी जंघाओं को घसीटता हुआ बढ़ रहा है,
और उसके चारों ओर
क्रुद्ध मरु-पक्षियों की छायाएँ डगमगाती हैं।
फिर अँधकार छा जाता है;
पर अब मैं जान गया हूँ—
बीस शताब्दियों की पथरीली निद्रा
एक झूले की हलचल से दुःस्वप्न बन गई है।
और कौन-सा वह विकराल पशु है
जिसकी घड़ी आखिर आ ही गई है,
जो बेथलहम की ओर
जन्म लेने को
घिसटता चला आ रहा है?
Translation by Gemini
દ્વિતીય આગમન (The Second Coming)
વિશાળ થતા ચક્રાવાતમાં ગોળ-ગોળ ઘૂમતું, બાજ હવે બાજપાલનો સાદ સુણી શકતું નથી; વસ્તુઓ વિખરાય છે; કેન્દ્ર હવે ટકી શકતું નથી; માત્ર અરાજકતા વિશ્વ પર છૂટી મૂકાઈ છે, રક્ત-રંજિત ભરતી ઉછળી છે, અને સર્વત્ર નિર્દોષતાનો ઉત્સવ ડૂબી રહ્યો છે; શ્રેષ્ઠ લોકોમાં નિશ્ચયનો અભાવ છે, જ્યારે કનિષ્ઠો ઝનૂની તીવ્રતાથી ભરેલા છે.
ચોક્કસ કોઈ સાક્ષાત્કાર નજીક છે; ચોક્કસ દ્વિતીય આગમન નજીક છે. દ્વિતીય આગમન! હજી તો આ શબ્દો બહાર આવે, ત્યાં જ 'સ્પિરિટસ મુંડી' (જગત-આત્મા) માંથી એક વિશાળ આકૃતિ મારી દ્રષ્ટિને ક્ષુબ્ધ કરે છે: રણની રેતીમાં ક્યાંક સિંહનું શરીર અને મનુષ્યનું મસ્તક ધરાવતો એક આકાર, સૂર્ય જેવી શૂન્ય અને નિર્દય જેની દ્રષ્ટિ છે, પોતાના મંથર સાથળ હલાવી રહ્યો છે, જ્યારે તેની આસપાસ રોષે ભરાયેલા રણ-પક્ષીઓના પડછાયા ઘૂમી રહ્યા છે.
અંધકાર ફરી ઉતરી આવે છે; પણ હવે હું જાણું છું કે પથ્થર જેવી વીસ સદીઓની નિદ્રાને એક પારણાના ઝૂલવાએ દુઃસ્વપ્નમાં ફેરવી નાખી હતી, અને કયું એ ભયાનક પશુ, જેનો સમય આખરે આવી ગયો છે, જન્મ લેવા માટે બેથલેહેમ તરફ લથડતા પગલે ધસી રહ્યું છે?
Comparative Analysis Report: W.B. Yeats’ “The Second Coming”
1. Comparative Analysis
Syntax, Sound, and Metre
ChatGPT (Hindi): Successfully replicates the blank verse feel of the original. By using words like Vartul (circle/gyre) and Baajpal (falconer), it creates a staccato, ominous rhythm. The syntax is structured to mirror the "falling apart" of the English lines, using punctuation to create the same breathless pace found in Yeats.
Gemini (Gujarati): Opts for a more prosaic syntax. While it captures the meaning, it loses the metrical "turning" of the first stanza. The Gujarati translation feels more like a literary explanation than a rhythmic poem, though it uses Chakravat (cyclone/gyre) effectively to denote the physical movement of the gyre.
Lexicon, Grammar, and Semiotics
Spiritus Mundi: This is a Latin term for the "World Soul."
ChatGPT leaves it in the original script/transliteration, preserving its "foreign" and mystical semiotic value.
Gemini adds a gloss (Jagat-Atma), which aids understanding but perhaps strips away the specific occult "flavor" Yeats intended.
The Beast: Yeats describes a Sphinx-like creature.
ChatGPT uses Vikral Pashu (Terrifying/Formidable Beast), which carries a Sanskritized weight appropriate for an apocalypse.
Gemini uses Bhayanak Pashu, which is slightly more common and less "mythic" in its lexical register.
Cultural Connotations and Collocations
The Second Coming: This is a deeply Christian collocation.
Hindi (Doosra Aagman) and Gujarati (Dvitiya Agaman) both use literal translations. However, in an Indic context, "Aagman" often suggests a welcome arrival of a deity. The AI tools struggle to convey the "nightmarish" irony Yeats attaches to this Christian return.
Bethlehem: Both tools correctly identify this as a proper noun. The challenge is the collocation "Slouches towards Bethlehem." ChatGPT uses Ghisat-ta (dragging/crawling), which captures the sinister, sub-human movement perfectly.
Challenges and Resolutions
The Gyre: The most difficult word. Yeats used it to describe historical cones of time.
Resolution: Both tools resolved this by using words related to "vortex" or "circles" (Vartul and Chakravat). They prioritized the visual image over the specific Yeatsian philosophy.
"The ceremony of innocence is drowned": This abstract metaphor is hard to translate into Indo-Aryan languages without sounding clunky.
ChatGPT uses Nirdoshta ke sanskar (The rituals/sacraments of innocence), which is a brilliant cultural equivalent to "ceremony."
2. Comparison Summary: ChatGPT vs. Gemini
ChatGPT (Hindi) performed better in poetic tone. It utilized a higher "Khariboli" register that matches the seriousness of Yeats’ prophetic voice. The choice of words like Unmatt (intoxicated/frenzied) for "passionate intensity" shows a deeper grasp of poetic nuance.
Gemini (Gujarati) performed better in conceptual clarity. It is a more "readable" translation for a general audience but sacrifices the haunting, rhythmic quality of the original poem.
3. Reflection: Theoretical Frameworks
The AI translations of these two poems (Faiz and Yeats) offer a live look at translation theory:
Jakobson’s Transposition: Jakobson argued that poetry requires "creative transposition." The AI does this when it turns "blank and pitiless" into Nishthur aur Shoonya. It isn't just swapping words; it’s swapping aesthetic values.
Catford’s Formal Correspondence: We see a "Level Shift" where the AI moves from the English Grammar (the passive voice in "is loosed") to Lexical choices in Hindi/Gujarati to emphasize that the anarchy was "let go."
Devy’s "Translation as Subversion": Interestingly, translating Yeats (a Western canon) into Hindi/Gujarati somewhat "Indigenizes" the apocalypse. By using words like Sanskar or Atma, the AI subverts the Western Christian context and places the "Rough Beast" within an Indic metaphysical framework.
Ramanujan’s Context-Sensitivity: Both tools showed high context-sensitivity. For Faiz, they stayed in the "romantic-revolutionary" register. For Yeats, they shifted to a "prophetic-apocalyptic" register.
Conclusion: AI tools are no longer mere "dictionaries"; they are becoming functionalists. They prioritize the Skopos (purpose) of the poem—to move the reader—even if they occasionally falter on the specific cultural "untouchables" like the specific fabrics in Faiz's poem or the specific theological dread in Yeats'.
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